This seems counter-intuitive to many on a spiritual path. We hear about the oneness and how important being in touch with oneness is. That we need to seek out the feeling of being in the oneness and that when we experience the oneness we have truly arrived. Having experienced the oneness and living consciously as part of it, I can tell you that these assumptions are erroneous. Why? because consciously seeking the oneness will keep one from it. One must be one with the self in order to be one with all. So, to experience this we must concentrate on ourselves as individuals. This is counter intuitive because we are also taught that we must be selfless, we must give of ourselves to others, we must be humble.
Being taught is exactly the problem here. We come into this world with a plethora of tools to help us to survive but they are slowly but surely stripped away from us. We are taught to go with the flow of whatever the societal values are of the society we are raised in. How to act so that we can get along but what is created in us is herd mentality. We are taught that we must do things that do not feel good in order to fit in. That even though something feels wonderful to us, it is not the proper way to be. We are taught that being unhappy is simply a reality of life or that if what makes others happy does not make us happy, we are wrong or worse, we are mentally ill. Think about how ludicrous this sounds. Wanting to do what makes us happy is being mentally ill? Being happy is wrong? But wait, we are told that if we do what others want and what makes others happy we will be happy. Then why is it that most of us that are doing this are not actually happy or only experience small tastes of happiness? It is because we are ignoring our individual wants. We are ignoring our feelings in favor of falsely programmed subconscious thoughts that were placed there by society. We are allowing our emotions (subconscious beliefs) to remain in charge instead of our feelings (our true nature which is in the causal body).
In order to become happy and remain happy we must concentrate on ourselves as individuals and always put our happiness above all else. When we do this, we come to fall madly in love with ourselves. We become self empowered. We have no problems taking complete responsibility for all of our actions because we know that whatever we do is done out of a space of love. We fear falling in love with the self because we are taught that to do so is vain, selfish and egotistical. I will tell you that this is completely untrue. Vanity and being egotistical are born out of a sense of comparing ourselves to others however; when a person truly concentrates on self love, there is no longer a need to compare oneself to another because the individual feels no need for this. There is no need because no matter what one looks like, they feel healthy, whole and loved. They will attract others that love them for who they are because we are drawn to those like us. We are drawn to those that love us no matter what our outside expression is. The constant feeling of a need for approval from others is gone and there is no need for comparison so no egotism or vanity. To be selfish is to be selfless. Why? because we cannot give someone else anything that we do not have. As an example; if we want to give someone money to help them buy food and we have no money to give them, we have nothing to give. It’s the same with love. If we do not love the individual self, we have nothing to give. Conversely; if we are filled with self love, we have more than enough to give to all of those around us. As a matter of fact, we ooze it and without effort we give it. Once we begin to ooze the love, we are automatically giving to others and they will respond. Boy do they respond. When they respond to us in ways that fill our hearts with joy, we begin to understand the nature of the oneness. We do not fear others. We are able to fully allow them into our energy fields. We become closer with everyone and everything. That is the nature of the oneness. The oneness can never be reached without a sense of individuality. A sense of who we are as a part of the collective whole. Individuality is one of the most important aspects of healing, empowering and self love. It is the most important aspect to making the world a loving place.